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Wednesday, August 31, 2005


I feel lost. Like a child left behind. I know that I am lucky to be alive, to be trapped hundreds of miles from the flood lands of a city who was part of who I am. I know that Life is what is important. I know, still I see the pictures of the small island roof tops as they are slowly swallowed and I can’t help but feel as if I am a ghost. A shell. Fading memory. I think of all that I held so important and hate myself for leaving with only the clothes on my back. WHY? Why not grab the sweet fairies pictures? Why not save the paper wings of my angel and all the art work they gave this world? Why not take something to remind me, something to show, some sort of proof. My empty hands hold no validation, no explanation of this loss. I am so scared to sleep, or look away. I am scared I will forget, as I am forgotten. Erased with no evidence, no fossils to tell the story. Washed away.
I feel forgotten.

For a picture of my general area you may go to:
New Orleans Mayor, "minimum hundreds more likely thousands" dead.
MANY bodies in the water, many more dead in attics.
Biloxi ~ My Scorpio ~ I love you! Do you hear me? I love you ~ 90 % of buildings gone. PLEASE BE SAFE!
For more info. on what is going on in the place of my home and the homes of my family and friends you can also visit:


Blogger Florisv said...

Maybe because you didn't expect it to be so bad. I doubt you will ofrget her. It doesn't look good. But perhpas, not everything is washed away.

I hope both you and Becca are ok, and all your loved ones.

Sleep, dream but not of the hurincane dream of your angel. Stayting up aal the time, may make you prone to forgetting things. I don't know who your angel is, but I can read that you care for her/him and I odubht you will ofrget.

You're safe now, sleep, it may not look good, but you need sleep as well. As long as you are there, the link with the past is not gone. You could remake some things, and although, I know its not the same, you could always note all the things on them that you remember of those before them.

So that there is a memory fo them, maybe not the original, but still it is better then nothing.

1:10 PM  
Blogger Florisv said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

1:17 PM  
Anonymous Becca said...

Honey you are not alone, Amanda and I love you and we are just as scared as you. We don't know what to expect either. So many people are saying, "Only time will tell", but I am tired of hearing that. I want to know when things will even resemble what used to be normal in our frequently chaotic lives. You know how to get in touch with me and Amanda, so don't hesitate to call us.

10:52 AM  
Blogger korryne said...

everythings changed so much this last week, and it's only now just starting to be real. i hate that i can't protect you from this. there are so few people that i love in this world, you are so very important to me. i wish i could hold you, tell you it's not real, it's all going to be ok. i feel so inadequate. last saturday, all i could think of was how terrible i would feel if you didn't leave, how i couldn't live with myself. well, you left, and now it's that i should have been there with my family, although i could do nothing, at least i should be there with you. i feel so helpless now, great addition to inadequate.

all i can say, is that you are with me, in my heart and in my thoughts, every second of the day. you, my best friend, but also my baby angel and the rest of the family. but right now i'm talking about you. all i can say, is that right now i have nothing, but anything i had i would give to you. to make you happy. one day you will be. i know that. i love you.

4:39 PM  
Blogger Florisv said...

I removed my other post, becuase I thaught I shouldn't bother you with that.

12:08 AM  

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