Ani DiFranco ~ Ani MOTHERFUCKING-COOLEST-CHICK-FUCKING-EVER-EVER DiFranco

Ani Difranco was at the Jazz Fest, opening day. She was, aside from beyond words, AWESOME. The weather was beautiful; the day had been great, surreal almost. During Cowboy Mouth we casually made our way to the front barricade and there I rocked out when she took the stage thirty minutes later. Elation was hard to suppress, except, seeing her, hearing some of her lyrics, memories rushed back and I admit, God how I missed you. I * you were there, even if not with me. I * you were there.

Faith & Hope

At what point does heroic faith become sad denial? Where is the thinly sprinkled line of non-existence which separates heart-felt belief from blind ignorance? What a dangerous concept, faith.

Sadness

My cousin tried to kill himself this weekend, he's fifteen and it's the second time.
I wonder if his sadness is the same as mine.
I wonder if he knows all I know and sees a limited choice of solutions, as I often do.
It occurs to me that he is braver than I, I find myself a little envious.
I hope he knows I love him, he is my beautiful baby goth teenage perfection.
I hope he knows I love him.

Fuck Me

I don’t care. I don’t have a heart. I am insensitive, I am hateful, and I am a waste. Or is it that I am wasted? I am hurt; I guess it could be why I am hurting you. Hold on to me, I’m getting lost again, wait… I can not be held down. I’m not the one who is spinning, it must be the world; right now I feel like I am the only one who is standing still. I don’t care. I don’t have a heart. I am insensitive, I am hateful, and I am a waste. Or is it that I am wasted? I am hurt; I guess it could be why I am hurting you. Hold on to me, I’m getting lost again, wait… I can not be held down. I’m not the one who is spinning, it must be the world; right now I feel like I am the only one who is standing still. I don’t care. I don’t have a heart. I am insensitive, I am hateful, and I am a waste. Or is it that I am wasted? I am hurt; I guess it could be why I am hurting you. Hold on to me, I’m getting lost again, wait… I can not be held down. I’m not the one who is spinning, it must be the world; right now I feel like I am the only one who is standing still. I don’t care. I don’t have a heart. I am insensitive, I am hateful, and I am a waste. Or is it that I am wasted? I am hurt; I guess it could be why I am hurting you. Hold on to me, I’m getting lost again, wait… I can not be held down. I’m not the one who is spinning, it must be the world; right now I feel like I am the only one who is standing still. I don’t care. I don’t have a heart. I am insensitive, I am hateful, and I am a waste. Or is it that I am wasted? I am hurt; I guess it could be why I am hurting you. Hold on to me, I’m getting lost again, wait… I can not be held down. I’m not the one who is spinning, it must be the world; right now I feel like I am the only one who is standing still. I don’t care. I don’t have a heart. I am insensitive, I am hateful, and I am a waste. Or is it that I am wasted? I am hurt; I guess it could be why I am hurting you. Hold on to me, I’m getting lost again, wait… I can not be held down. I’m not the one who is spinning, it must be the world; right now I feel like I am the only one who is standing still. Like I can not move, like I am frozen. Like this is not my life and I may never wake up.